So... I !AM! a teenager!!!

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Posted On: 7/19/2005
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Some program manager for MSN flipped me to this "RealAge" website, where some people have come up with an assessment test for determining your physical age rather than just your chronological age. Makes sense, considering all that we subject our bodies and minds to in this world... good and bad. So, what were the results?

I must first preface my results with an interesting tidbit of info... At 26 years of age, people ALWAYS mistake me for a teenager! hmm... Well, I am a kid at heart and have been very active much of my life, which keeps me healthy. I was walking in a popular outdoor mall last year (25 years old), when rent-o-cop is standing there in the middle of the walkway and asks me, "Where are you headed?" I slowed my walk and thought nothing of it... "Barnes & Noble," I replied. "And, how old are you?" he inquired. (WTF?!) This guy's standing there so the little teenie-boppers don't break their curfue by waiting in a designated area until their parents pick them up. "25!" I exclaimed rather proudly and simply shrugged the guy off. My face is "young"... that's all. Or, so I thought...

(play dramatic music here!)

My chronological age at this time is 26.6. Okay... nothing new here. BUT! My "RealAge" is 17.7! AH HA!!!!! There's the proof! FINALLY!!! ALL IS ANSWERED IN THIS CRAZY WORLD! ...

(Eric performs a relaxing exercise to return to lowercase...)

So, I'm almost 8 years younger than my chronological age? Yup. Sounds about right actually. Oddly enough, if they had a mental / emotional age assessment they would recognize that I'm in my 30's and that balances it all out.

The greatest part of taking the test was this statement: "Your RealAge is 17.7. But you could be younger--in as few as 90 days" by signing up for their "RealAge Reduction Plan". LOL!!! I can be younger than 8 years younger!!! Woo hoo! I can be 15 years old again!!!

All I have to do is stop talking on the cell phone while driving, take my daily vitamins, exercise and floss my teeth more regularly, get accurate measurements of my blood pressure / HDL / total cholesterol levels, eat breakfast EVERY day, and to eat more vegetables, fruit, grains, and (surprisingly) unsaturated fat! That's all?! No wonder why I'm such an old fart...

So... I !AM! a teenager!!!

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